How horny am I?

How horny am I? Oh, let me count the ways:

1. I'm so horny, listening to the pre-recorded voice of my telco phone customer support turns me on.

2. I'm so horny, I'm actually listening to Marvin Gaye singing Let's Get it On

3. I'm so horny, I thought of trying to hit on the 'auntie' from my office.

4. I'm so horny, I'm staying clear of women holding lollipops.

5. I'm so horny, screwdrivers are sounding more and more like a sex toy.

6. I'm so horny, midget sex doesn't seem like such a gross idea after all.

7. I'm so horny, the thought of fucking a fat woman doesn't make me puke anymore.

8. I'm so horny, "You want fries with that?" is starting to sound like a pick-up line.

9.I'm so horny, I tried looking up the skirt of a guan yin statue before remembering that goddesses don't have vagina's.

10. I'm so horny, getting a blowjob from even from a guy may be.... wait a minute... no.... sorry... I'm not THAT horny.

If you find me in my bedroom, dead with a massive hard on, it probably means I died of horniness.