Dirty Deed : One down

A stare for a full 2 seconds at the box being handed to me

I paused.. as if hesitating.. but in truth, I had already made up my mind long time ago....Long before I was seated at this table.. long before I was offered it...

its a filthy habit

I grab it.. and they smirk at me... "Now that's more like it" they say.. I read it all over their foreheads...

it's one of the things I never wanted to do...

I take out a stick... It feels so much lighter than I'd expect.. In my huge palms, it looks tiny. I'm not even sure how to hold it.. Is two fingers enough?

it makes your teeth ugly... it's a waste of money.. it causes cancer..

I finally bite it... and ask for a light.. The sassy girl I'm sitting next to offers one.. Special treatment from a beautiful girl... for the guy who's first time it supposedly is....

what if you get addicted? What if you get hooked?

"Fuck it.. I don't care.. It's about fucking time.. I should have got it over with years ago.. " I think to myself..

Is this really me? What the hell am I doing? This isn't me...

"Precisely... it's because this isn't me... That's precisely why I'm doing it.. I'm sick of being so me..... I need to get out of my own skin...."....

I take a deep breath and see the tip of it lighting up.. I feel the smoke go down my throat.. I taste the sweet smell of tobacco....

It's surprisingly easy... I didn't choke. I had expected I would. I hold it in and let it out slowly....

Now you've done it.. What you said you'd do, you happy now?.....

Hell yeah... But I kinda expected more....On the third puff I tried taking it in deeper.. and find myself blowing smoke from my nose.....

"WHAT THE HELL.. I thought you said this is your first time?" she says..

"It IS my first time.. I've never smoked in my life.."

"LIAR.. I've been smoking for years.. and even I don't know how to do that." she says

"Do what?"

"That thing you just did. Blowing it out of your nose. LIAR.." she tells me...

What the fuck? I didn't realize what just happened. Did I just go overboard?

"IT IS MY FIRST TIME..."

"Whatever.. liar.. I think it'd be more obvious if it were your first time.."

Whatever.... believe what you want. I'm not here to prove anything.. not to you anyway..

So I finally took my first puff, a damn 5 years after puberty.. talk about late bloomers. Shit, I think I have a lot of catching up to do. I'm not a smoker.. I just smoke. There's a difference...

Hacks sweets and mints comes out and gets distributed.. pfftt.. of course... to hide the smell. Looks like I wasn't the only one with a secret to hide.

Start smoking? Check

One down......

Two more to go....